World of Arcana

Anybody who knows me knows that I am notoriously good at coming up with great ideas for projects, working on them once, and then never doing anything with them again. While this obviously has some ill effects, i.e. a lot of projects that I want to do never get accomplished, it also works as an indicator to me that a project that I’ve worked on multiple times is actually worth accomplishing.

So anyway, I’m cleaning out my room today, and I find a notebook from 4 years ago. Now notebooks are where most of my failed ideas reside, so I eagerly flipped through to see what I’d forgotten about. I was greeted with the index for a book I was planning to write where I ranted about various ideas that I had thought of. I only wrote the first three chapters, but here’s the table of contents that I had come up with:

• Foreword by J.K. Rowling
• F***
• If You Took a Dog
• Communism vs. A Plate of S***
• Bad Answers
• How To Kill A Man
  _{(and other things I learned in Canada)}
• Clowns vs. Statisticians
  _{(or: Communism vs. A Plate of S*** Part II)}
• Making People Sad
  _{(or: If You Took a Dog Part II)}
• What’s Up With Oregon?
  _{(or: The (U?) S of A)}
• Flying Monkeys My Ass!
  _Intermission

Yeah, and also, as anybody who knows me knows as well, I was not very funny when I was younger. But I thought I was. And that’s all that’s important.